


Hold On

by Chibi_Mochi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Angst, Emotional Manipulation, M/M, Physical Abuse, Self-Esteem Issues, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:21:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chibi_Mochi/pseuds/Chibi_Mochi
Summary: Atsumu and Oikawa never noticed how their bright and cheery smile slowly faded, and they're left with nothing but dull eyes and forced smiles as their life was slowly sucked away by the relationship they were once proud of.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 19
Kudos: 125
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A bonus day of Haikyuu Angst Week 2020  
> Tier: 1, 2 & 3: Tears, Sacrifice, and "Has it always been this quiet?"

Atsumu sat on the same spot Oikawa and him would occupy in the cafe they frequent. He was tapping his finger on the hot cup filled with dark coffee as he waits for his friend. He had his lips pressed into a thin line as he tries his best to suppress the tears that were brimming in his eyes. He couldn't help but think about how Sakusa had turned his back on him and the humiliation he felt as he begs for him to stay. The words thrown at him by Sakusa's friends would always sting his heart, and the more he thinks about it, the lower he feels as he's reminded of how low he had sunk for Sakusa Kiyoomi.

A tear had already escaped his eye, and he wiped it with the back of his hand, and just as tears were ready to flow from his eyes freely, Oikawa had already pulled the chair in front of him and cupped his cheeks. He could hear Oikawa's ragged breathing, and he could see the beads of sweat rolling on the side of his face as he says, "I'm sorry, I was late. Are you all alright? Why are you crying?"

Oikawa's palms felt nice on Atsumu's cheeks and his lips slowly curved into a smile as slight comfort start to warm his heart. "It's alright, Toto-kun," he whispered and held Oikawa's hands. He leaned into it and closed his eyes as he takes a deep breath. He needed to gather enough courage before he tells his friend what happened. He didn't want to break down as he tells how Sakusa scoffed when his friends scorned and degraded him.

"Sakusa broke up with me," Atsumu whispered. A sob escaped his lips, and he ended up breaking down in front of Oikawa. The brunette stood up and wrapped his arms around the blonde, who was trembling. Atsumu gulped as he wraps his arms around Oikawa, his fingers tightly gripping his friend's long sleeve as he cries into his shoulder.

They couldn't tell how long they remained silent as Atsumu cries his heart out. They didn't care if people were staring, it was none of their business, so when Atsumu was done, Oikawa went back to his seat and ordered them some food before they resumed conversing. Atsumu's eyes were red and puffy as he stares blankly into the black liquid that filled his cup.

"Are you okay with telling me what happened?" Oikawa asked after their orders were placed on the table. Atsumu's lips curved into a sad smile as he answers, "yeah,"

Atsumu took a deep breath and started with his story, "Sakusa asked me to meet him in his apartment. I didn't know he'd break up with me there. But what I didn't expect the most was he'd do it in front of his friends,"

Atsumu could see how Oikawa's grip on his glass tightened, but he chose to ignore it, "did you beg?" Oikawa asked, and Atsumu nodded.

"I did. I asked him not to go, I got on my knees and told him I'd do anything for him," Atsumu narrated; his tears started to cloud his vision, so he harshly wiped his tears away with the back of his hand before continuing, "I begged, but it wasn't enough. I could hear his friends mocking me. It hurts so bad, but I didn't want to let go of him. They were filming it, and Sakusa didn't do anything. He just laughed when I groveled,"

Atsumu could hear the trembling of his voice as he tells Oikawa everything. His chest felt so tight, and it felt like needles were pricking his heart. It was so painful that it was getting hard to breathe, but he couldn't stop crying. He clutched his chest and hunched his back as if he was curling himself into a ball.

"You groveled?" Oikawa asked in disbelief, groveling was the lowest a person could go, and Atsumu could tell Oikawa wasn't happy. Atsumu could hear the rage in his voice, and he was too scared to look up and see what kind of expression Oikawa was making. Though Oikawa looked pretty on regular days, he was scary when he's mad.

"I swear to God. I'll fucking kill Kiyoomi!" He heard Oikawa yell before he heard his chair being pushed back. Atsumu raised his head in pure alert and grabbed Oikawa's wrist to stop him from leaving.

Atsumu's eyes were glued to the mixture of red, purple, and blue that decorated Oikawa's wrist. He raised his head and saw an expression that made him look like he was caught doing something bad. All the sadness Atsumu felt went down the drain as he asks, "Haji beat you up again?"

Oikawa avoided his gaze, so he stood up and guided Oikawa to sit back down, "what happened? Why did he beat you up this time?" Atsumu asked as he pulls Oikawa's sleeve upward to look for bruises. Atsumu's heart stung for Oikawa. He looked up at his friend with pity in his eyes. Atsumu wanted to keep eye contact with Oikawa, but the brunette refused to raise his head.

"I was talking with the sales clerk," Oikawa answered, his voice low and almost inaudible. Atsumu could feel his blood boil at the thought of Iwaizumi beating up Oikawa because of it. Atsumu ran his hand through his hair, and he said through gritted teeth, "I'm gonna beat the shit out of Iwaizumi when I see him,"

Atsumu heard a small chuckle from Oikawa, which made him furrow his eyebrows, "why are you laughing?"

"We'll beat each other's boyfriend up, but we can't do it for ourselves," Oikawa said in a bitter tone with his lips curved into a sad smile. Atsumu could see Oikawa's lips tremble before tears started to fall from his eyes. Atsumu reached for his hand, and this time, he was the one who stood up to give Oikawa a comforting hug.

Atsumu could feel Oikawa shaking as he suppresses his sobs. Oikawa had always been a quiet crier, he would always bite his bottom lip to stop himself from releasing a sob, and it broke Atsumu that he had to see Oikawa crying like this. He was quietly hugging the brunette while Oikawa grabbed his arm tightly.

"Hey, Tsumu-chan," Oikawa whispered as he wipes his tears away. Atsumu hummed as a sign for him to continue, "has it always been this quiet?"

Atsumu couldn't answer. He returned to his seat and helped Oikawa blow his nose. They couldn't tell when the laughter that filled the cafe was replaced with silence. They couldn't remember when their once joyous eyes turned dull and shed tears. And neither of them didn't realize that they had sacrificed their entire world for two people who did nothing but break them.

"Let's run away," Atsumu suggested after a few minutes of silence, Oikawa stared at him with a stunned expression, but the blond just gave him a tired smile.

"Tsumu-chan, you know Matsukawa and Iwaizumi will hunt me down," Oikawa whispered in fear. Atsumu felt his heart shatter when he saw how terrified Oikawa looked.

Atsumu took a deep breath and reached out for Oikawa's hand. He held them tight as he says, "we've sacrificed a lot for them. We've shed enough tears for them. I think it's time for us to run away and get our lives back,"

Atsumu could tell Oikawa wanted it too, but there was still fear in his eyes, so he continued, "Osamu offered to let us stay with them at Amagasaki. But if you don't want to see him being sweet with Rin, we can stay with Kita. He once offered me to stay at their house, with him and his grandmother,"

Oikawa smiled and wiped his tears away, "I want that, but I don't know if I could leave Hajime," Atsumu didn't know what to say. He can't tell Oikawa to break up with him. They've told each other countless times that they should break up with their significant other, but they were too stubborn to listen to each other.

"Okay, I'll wait at the train station tomorrow if you want to come with me," Atsumu said as he leans on his chair. Oikawa nodded and fidgeted with his fingers.

"Tsumu-chan, thank you," Oikawa said, and Atsumu smiled, a small genuine one, "thanks too,"

They remained silent after that. Their presence was enough to bring comfort to each other as they ate. Neither of them said anything but both of them were thinking the same things. They were wondering about how their once healthy and happy relationship turned for the worse. They used to brag to each other about how perfect their boyfriends were, how Sakusa would pamper Atsumu him and lull him to sleep, or how Iwaizumi would cling to Oikawa and go the extra mile for him. They used to happily meet up and gush about their boyfriend on the same spot they occupied now, but this time they weren't gushing about how wonderful their boyfriends were. This time, they were crying because of how bad their boyfriends treated them.

They asked themselves, _"Has it always been this quiet?"_

They knew the answer was no because they used to be loud. They used to bring life to places they went to. They used to glow and radiate confidence and positivity. They were once the life of the party, and they were never quiet. But now, they were lifeless. They didn't bring color to the places they visit. They didn't bring positivity to the people around them. Now, they were like empty shells going through the motions of life. They've sacrificed everything for the person they love, and now, they're left with nothing but insecurities and self-doubt.

Oikawa returned to the apartment he shared with Iwaizumi, and the moment the door behind him was closed, he was met with a hard punch. Oikawa fell to the ground with a metallic taste in his mouth. He wiped his lips as the other felt for his jaw, he still hasn't recovered from the blows he received from Iwaizumi the other day, and yet there he was, lying on the ground with a broken jaw.

"What did I tell you, Tooru?" Iwaizumi asked as he crouches in front of him and raises Oikawa's chin with his forefinger. Oikawa gulped and took a deep breath as he answers, "I shouldn't go out,"

A slap landed on the other side of Oikawa's face, and he winced as he feels the stinging pain, "you knew, but you still went out, tell me, who did you meet up with this time?"

Oikawa gulped, he licked his lips, and Iwaizumi scoffed, "Miya, of course, you met up with Miya Atsumu," Iwaizumi said bitterly before standing up.

Oikawa felt pain coursing through his veins when Iwaizumi kicked his stomach. He curled into a ball as he gasps for air. He looked up at Iwaizumi with tears in his eyes as he begs, "I'm sorry, Hajime, I'll stay here, I promise, please, stop. It hurts," Oikawa's voice was trembling as he pleads, but Iwaizumi scoffed and grabbed a fistful of his hair to pull him up.

Oikawa whimpered, but Iwaizumi didn't care, "if only you were a good boy and listened to me, then this wouldn't be happening to you. It's your fault Oikawa, everything that's happening to you is your fault, not mine,"

Oikawa could feel himself being dragged by his hair, and it was the last straw. He didn't want to live like this anymore, so he shoved one hand into his pocket to call the person that replaced Iwaizumi on his speed dial.

Atsumu was quietly packing his things when his phone started to ring. He saw Oikawa's caller ID flashing on his screen, so he immediately answered it, "Toto-kun?"

Atsumu didn't hear a response. Instead, he heard a loud bang from the other end of the line. He could feel his heart racing at the sound, and he immediately ran to the door without ending the call.

"Tooru," Atsumu called out as calmly as he can. He knew that letting Oikawa hear how panicked he is will only make the latter panic even more, so he tried his best to sound as calm as possible not to trigger his friend. He opened his car and drove to Iwaizumi and Oikawa's apartment while repeatedly calling for Oikawa, praying he'd receive a response.

He arrived at their apartment with paramedics rushing out, and he was met with a bloody Oikawa lying on the stretcher. He ran to him and pushed through all the paramedics stopping him, telling him that he's not allowed to go near him.

"I'm his friend, goddammit! He called me!" Atsumu yelled when two of the paramedics grabbed him to stop him from approaching him. Atsumu's tears were streaming down his face as he stares at Oikawa's limp and bloody body on the stretcher.

One of the paramedics confirmed that he was indeed the person Oikawa called, so they let him follow, but he saw Iwaizumi catching up to them as he did. Atsumu turned around charged towards Iwaizumi, planting a heavy punch on Iwaizumi's face. Atsumu was ready to give him another one, but Sakusa was there to grab his fist.

"Fucking hell, Miya! When are you going to learn not to meddle with other people's business?!" Sakusa yelled, his grip on Atsumu's fist tightening.

Atsumu pulled his fist away and glared at Iwaizumi. If he and Oikawa were best of friends, so were Sakusa as Iwaizumi. Both of them befriended each other to keep an eye on Oikawa and Atsumu to make sure that they weren't cheating on both of them, which thinking about it now was a huge red flag.

Atsumu was ready to yell at Sakusa, but the paramedics called his attention, asking if he was going to ride the ambulance with them or not. Atsumu yelled that he would, but before walking to the ambulance, he left a threat, "don't you dare follow us or I'll personally snap your neck,"

Atsumu dashed towards the ambulance and sat there, holding Oikawa's hand. He did his best not to cry. Oikawa had always been there for him when he was at his lowest, and it's his turn to be strong for Oikawa.

"Tsumu," Oikawa whispered. It was forced, and his breathing was labored. Atsumu scooted closer and leaned in to show Oikawa that he was listening.

"What is it, Toto," Atsumu asked. He was thankful his lips didn't shake. Oikawa needed him, and he reminded himself that he needed to suppress the tears in his eyes.

"Tell me what we're gonna do after we run away," Oikawa whispered weakly. Atsumu nodded and took a deep breath.

"Once we get to Kita, we'll be spending time in his rice fields, we'll be helping him plant, and we'll totally suck at it," Atsumu started as he imagines what it will be like for them when they start a new life, a life away from their toxic boyfriends, a fresh new start.

"You're the only one who'll suck," Oikawa forced before he started gasping for air again. Atsumu furiously nodded, "Right, you'll be awesome at the first try,"

Oikawa released a breathy chuckle before coughing out blood, "tell me more," Oikawa whispered as if he didn't just cough out blood.

"We'll celebrate our first harvest and deliver the rice to Osamu. We'll then hear him complain about how the quality wasn't as good as Kita's, and then we'll start bantering before filling our stomach with his food. After that, we'll visit your loyal disciple, Yahaba. We'll spend a day with him and pester him and his students," Atsumu continued. 

"That sounds nice," Oikawa whispered. He could see Oikawa's lips curving into a smile as his breathing slows down.

"Tooru, we'll do a lot of things together, we'll go back to Argentina and visit your old teammates, so hold on," Atsumu begged, "hold on, Tooru, you deserve to be happy, so please, hold on,"


	2. Chapter 2

They arrived at the hospital, and Oikawa was immediately rushed into the Emergency Room while Atsumu stood outside the door, waiting for the doctors to tell him Oikawa was okay. He sat outside with his hands clutched together when someone sat beside him, he turned to check who it is, and his blood started to boil.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Atsumu asked, trying to control the anger in his voice.

Iwaizumi glared at him while Sakusa, who accompanied Iwaizumi, watched them silently.

"What did they say about Tooru?" Iwaizumi asked, his voice laced in genuine concern, and it made Atsumu want to vomit.

"You're the reason why he's here, and you have the audacity to ask me that?" Atsumu asked, his voice laced in venom as his stares throw daggers at him.

"That's not the question, Miya, just answers Iwaizumi properly," Sakusa says, his voice full of authority, and it made Atsumu feel restricted again. The same feeling of restriction he felt when they were still together.

"Fuck off, you're not even involved in this," Atsumu says while glaring at Sakusa, something he's always been afraid of doing.

"I'm Iwaizumi's friend. What did you expect? Now, get out of the way, Miya, this isn't your problem," Sakusa says, making Atsumu clench his jaw and fist his hands.

"Well, I'm Oikawa's friend, so there's nothing you can do about that," Atsumu scoffs and gives Sakusa the fakest smile he could offer.

Sakusa rolls his eyes, and they were enveloped in silence after. Neither talked as they wait for the doctors to come out. Atsumu's eyes darted towards his company and sighs. He wanted to shoo them away, but he didn't have the energy to do so, so he walks away and asks for one of the paramedics who accompanied them in the ambulance to have the guards kick them out.

The paramedic looked at Atsumu before looking at the two unknowing men standing outside the Emergency Room. The paramedic was aware of what had transpired between the four of them while Oikawa was being rushed inside the ambulance. She was also aware of why Oikawa is currently inside the Emergency Room. Hence, she nods and calls for the guards, asking them to assist the two men out of the hospital.

Atsumu watched as Iwaizumi and Sakusa were assisted outside. Iwaizumi was throwing a fit, screaming and cursing as the guards take them away, while Sakusa silently complied and moved as far as he is allowed to from the guards.

Relief settles in Atsumu's chest, and he thanks the paramedic for her service. Atsumu returns outside of the Emergency Room, and after a few hours of waiting, Oikawa was brought out and transferred to a private room.

Atsumu trailed behind the nurses and doctors, waiting for them to tell him anything. A few minutes passed, and the doctors turned to him to tell him that Oikawa had a concussion from having his head hit something hard. Aside from the concussion, the doctors also had to remove shards of broken glass that sunk into Oikawa's skin. Atsumu closed his eyes as he tries to push the mental image away. He didn't want to imagine what Iwaizumi had done, and he didn't want to think about how he had the guts to do that to the person who loved him for years.

Atsumu continued to listen despite his head throbbing in pain. He listened to how he can help Oikawa with simple things and help clean his wound if the brunette didn't want the nurses to do it. Atsumu listened carefully, making sure he doesn't miss a single detail, before thanking the doctors and allowing them to leave.

Atsumu was left with an unconscious Oikawa lying on a hospital bed with dextrose connected to the back of his hand. Atsumu took one of Oikawa's hands in his as he waits for the brunette to wake up.

Once Oikawa opens his eyes, Atsumu immediately leans closer, asking, "are you alright? Do you need anything?"

Oikawa shook his head and said, "let's run away, Atsumu. I don't want to stay here,"

Tears immediately fell from Oikawa's eyes as he says those words to Atsumu, and it broke the latter's heart. Oikawa must be in so much pain for him to say those words the moment he opens his eyes, and Atsumu wanted to take away the pain, so he nods.

"Alright, we'll run away," Atsumu says and runs his hand through Oikawa's curly brown locks. He gulps and doesn't mention that Iwaizumi and Sakusa had followed them to the hospital. He didn't want to scare him, so he keeps his mouth shut and makes sure Oikawa doesn't find out.

Atsumu lies beside Oikawa that night, telling him childhood stories and singing to him to make him feel comforted. It took an hour before Oikawa started to drift off to sleep while gripping Atsumu's shirt tightly.

The blond watched Oikawa sleep, and when a few minutes had passed, he decided to pry Oikawa's arms off him to call for the doctors. He explained the situation and had the paramedics aware of the situation, back-up his claims as he asks for them to be transferred to a different hospital. He also asked them to keep Oikawa's information confidential and not tell anyone about the transfer.

The doctors nodded and arranged for a transfer. Atsumu helped Oikawa with his daily routine, he helped him eat and change, and the first time Atsumu saw Oikawa's naked body, he felt his blood run cold as he stares at the bruises, wounds, and stitches on the brunette's body. Atsumu takes a deep breath and braves himself to ask, "don't you want to sue Iwaizumi for abuse?"

Oikawa looked at him with dead eyes as he shakes his head, "I don't want anything to do with him, 'Tsumu. Suing him would mean having to deal with attorneys and prosecutors and relive and tell everyone what happened to me. I don't want that, 'Tsumu. I want to be free from him,"

Atsumu nodded at Oikawa's answer, and he never asked again. Atsumu tried to get used to the bruises, wounds, and stitches, but he couldn't. It breaks his heart every time he sees them, and it makes him want to take Oikawa away even more.

Three days passed, and they were transferred to a different hospital. Atsumu could tell how secured Oikawa had felt after the transfer, and he was glad he made that choice.

Oikawa became a little livelier, and a little bit of life came back to his eyes when they stayed in the hospital they transferred in in silence. Atsumu was happy for him, and he was ecstatic when he saw the Oikawa beam when he was discharged.

"We can escape, 'Tsumu, we can go to Hyogo!" Oikawa beamed as they pack their things. Atsumu nodded and smiled at him, saying, "Say hello to our new found freedom,"

Oikawa nodded, and they hopped into the train to Hyogo, with a smile on their face as they look forward to starting their lives over again.

But running away wasn't easy, especially for Oikawa, who turned away from home and took refuge in someone else's. Oikawa thought he'd never experience what home felt like. Still, he was wrong because he felt the same warmth of a father in the form of a loving rice farmer named Kita Shinsuke, the warmth of a mother in the form of a sweet grandmother named Kita Yumie, and the warmth of a brother in the form of a loud blond named Miya Atsumu. Leaving Tokyo and running to Hyogo instead of Miyagi wasn't easy, but Oikawa didn't regret it. How can he when Hyogo gave him nothing but good memories and pure bliss while Miyagi reminded him of the person who hurt and broke him? But that didn't mean it was easy.

Oikawa's first night at Hyogo was terrible. He woke up drenched in a cold sweat, his heart beating erratically after dreaming about Iwaizumi. He looked at the clock, resting on his bedside table. He saw that it was 1:49 A.M. He didn't want to bother anyone, so he decided to pull the blanket over his shoulder and closed his eyes in an attempt to fall asleep again, but the moment he closed his eyes, Iwaizumi's sadistic grin flashed in his memories forcing him to open his eyes. He tried again, and the second time it did, he accepted the fact that he wouldn't be sleeping that night.

Oikawa stood up from his bed and walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water. He was leaning against the kitchen table, staring at the water in his glass, when a loud thud followed by cursing startled him. The first thing that came to his mind was that Iwaizumi found him. Panic immediately flooded his system, and he started to hyperventilate. It hasn't even been a full day since he and Atsumu arrived at Hyogo to stay at Kita's house so, why? How did Iwaizumi find him that fast?

"Oikawa," A voice called out, and he felt someone grabbing his shoulders. Oikawa immediately pushed the hands away and scrambled to the furthest corner of the kitchen. He grabbed what he could and pointed it towards the silhouette in front of him and said, "stay back,"

The figure raised his hands and slowly spoke, "it's okay, Tooru, it's me," Atsumu's voice echoed in the empty kitchen, and Oikawa's tensed body slowly relaxed. He lowered the hand that tightly gripped the utensil and clutched his chest with the other as he calms himself down. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before raising his head and seeing Atsumu standing a few meters away from him.

"Ya, good?" Atsumu asked, and when Oikawa nodded, the blond walked to him and pulled him into a hug, his hands rubbing patterns on Oikawa's back.

They were in silence when a voice startled them, making them turn to where it came from.

"Kita-san," Oikawa whispered when he saw the bi-color haired man leaned on the wall and stare at them, face as impassive as ever.

"Ya, two, alright?" Kita asked, his voice the same monotone and heavy with the Kansai dialect Oikawa had heard when they arrived. Oikawa didn't know how to answer, so he took a few steps away from Atsumu and played with his shirt's hem to let the blond answer instead.

"No," Atsumu answered honestly. Oikawa raised his head and saw Atsumu run his hand through his hair, his lips pressed into a thin line, "I've been having nightmares about Sakusa,"

Oikawa chewed on his bottom lip and looked up at Kita, who was staring at him, eyes looking like he was expecting an answer from the brunette. Oikawa licked his lips and gulped as he says, "me too, I've been having nightmares about Iwa-chan,"

Oikawa could feel their eyes on him, so he lowered his gaze and stared at the wooden floor in embarrassment. The kitchen was filled with silence after that, but it didn't last long.

"Right, sit down, ya two, while I prepare somethin'," Kita said and walked to the stove. Atsumu held Oikawa's wrist and said, "I think it's better if ya keep that one,"

Oikawa turned to look at what he had in his hand and saw that he had grabbed a knife from earlier, "I'm sorry," he apologized and returned it before they sat in front of each other while Kita quietly prepared something for them.

"Here," Kita said and placed two cups of tea in front of them before placing a fatty tuna onigiri in front of Atsumu and pieces of milk bread in front of Oikawa and sitting beside Atsumu.

Oikawa blinked at the food placed in front of him before looking at Kita with confusion.

"Atsumu would tell me stories about ya and would complain 'bout how ya would always order milk bread whenever ya went to the cafe ya both frequented," Kita said as he peels pears.

"Thank you, Kita-san," Oikawa said, not knowing what else to say. He suddenly felt warm inside, and he couldn't help the smile that found its way on his face at how soft he is. He couldn't remember when was the last time someone aside from Atsumu was kind to him. It's a weird feeling. He never knew he craved being cared for, and having felt it for the first time in years made him tear up.

"Shit, why are ya crying?" Atsumu asked and reached out to wipe Oikawa's tears. The brunette released a choked laugh as he says, "thank you for taking me in,"

"Oh," Atsumu mouthed and moved back to take a roll of tissue. He handed it to Oikawa before sitting back on his chair. "It's nothin'. We're practically brothers. You're like a third Miya, a Miya better than 'Samu,"

Oikawa chuckled, "I'm pretty sure Osamu won't like hearing that,"

"But it's true," Atsumu said and took a bite of his onigiri. Oikawa laughed and suddenly felt at ease.

"Ya can sleep with me tonight if ya both want to," Kita offered, making Atsumu beam, while Oikawa nodded, feeling like an eight-year-old sleeping with his parents after having a nightmare.

Later that night, Atsumu and Oikawa slept in Kita's room on different futons only to find themselves waking up in the morning, with hands clutching Kita's shirt. They both laughed at it, and that's when Amagasaki started feeling like home to Oikawa.

Oikawa and Atsumu were sitting on the Engawa of the house, heads thrown back as they pant. It's been almost a year since they started living with Kita, and it was fun. The nightmares were gone, and everything started to feel nice again. It was like they lived a different life, a life far better than the life they once had in Tokyo.

"We've been helpin' Kita with this fer months, but it's still exhaustin'," Atsumu said as he lets himself plop on the Engawa with his limps spread wide.

"Yeah, it's more exhausting than a five-set match," Oikawa whispered after a chuckle. They both remained silent after that. It's been years since they played. Ever since their boyfriends started to question their relationship, they were forced to quit volleyball. It seemed impossible back then, so they were amazed that they willingly gave up something they loved with their whole heart for the people who ended up hurting them.

"Say, do ya ever miss volleyball?" Atsumu asked while looking up at the sky. Oikawa turned his head towards him and pressed his lips into a thin line before answering with a nod and a hum.

"Why don't ya go to the local tournament next week?" Grandmother Yumie asked, making them turn their heads towards her, Atsumu immediately sat up, and they each reached out a hand to guide her towards them. A laugh escaped her lips as she sits between them with a plate of watermelons.

"Nah, I think it's better if I just help Kita that week. Maybe Toto-kun would like that," Atsumu said, eyeing Oikawa, who shook his head as an answer.

"I agree with Atsumu on this one," Oikawa said, both of them knew they were lying. They wanted to go, but they were scared. They were terrified that maybe the love they once had for volleyball wouldn't be there. They were petrified that maybe the love and passion they once had was replaced by fear and became nothing but a reminder of the people they fell in love with as they play on the same court.

"Stop lyin' to yourselves and just go," Kita said as he approaches them. He wiped the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve and gave his grandmother a quick kiss on her head as he sits between his grandmother and Atsumu.

"Nah, we decided to help you, Shin-chan," Atsumu said and eyed Oikawa for help. The brunette immediately nodded and added, "yeah, Shin-chan, you need more help with the farm-"

"No, we finished everything needed for the next harvest. You're free for the next month," Kita said, making them gulp. "Let's all go. If ya don't feel comfortable, then we'll head home,"

The setters didn't have a choice once Kita proposed the idea, but they wouldn't say they were forced, not when they felt a small hint of excitement in their chest as they look forward to the tournament. The days leading to the tournament were spent with them roaming around Amagasaki and touring Oikawa. First, they went to Amagasaki Castle, they took photos and played in the children's park. Second, they went to Amarago Water Park, where they played in the pool with the rest of Atsumu's former teammates. Third, they went to Amagasaki Fishing Park with Osamu and Suna, surprisingly good at fishing. They caught a few and cooked them as their dinner. They continued to visit various tourist sites until the day finally came, where they took a step in JT Marvelous Gymnasium after traveling to Nishinomiya.

The lights were glaring, and the cheers were ringing in their ear. The gym smelled of salonpas, and the sound of the ball hitting the floor made of wood and synthetic urethane reverberated in the enclosed gym. Oikawa and Atsumu could feel a rush of excitement course through their veins as they watch the players do their warm-ups. They looked for a spot to occupy, and when the whistle blew for the first serve, their observant eyes immediately locked themselves on the ball as they think of plays they would do if it were them playing on the court. They started conversing about volleyball as if they never stopped playing and would ask Kita or grandma Yumie for their opinions. They spent the entire day spectating the games with eyes that held intensity and hands that itched to hold the ball. The day ended with them walking out of the gym with a rekindled love for volleyball.

"Hey, Tooru?" Atsumu asked as they lay on their respective futons. Ever since the kitchen incident, Kita suggested they share a room, and he was right because they fell asleep in great comfort, knowing that the other is only an arm's reach.

"What is it, Tsum-tsum?" Oikawa asked, eyes glued to the ceiling.

"Do you think it's safe to reach out to everyone again?" Atsumu asked, his voice uncertain and almost a whisper.

"You mean reactivate our social media?" Oikawa asked. Ever since he was sent to the hospital and Iwaizumi tracked them down through Oikawa's phone location, they decided to deactivate their SNS and abandon their old phones before transferring to a different hospital.

"Ya," Atsumu answered shortly. Oikawa hummed and closed his eyes. Iwaizumi wasn't haunting him every time he closes his eyes anymore. He thought about the photos they've taken and how much of a shame it was not to post them, so he turned to Atsumu, who was looking in his direction, and said with a smile on his face, "let's do it,"

They took their phones in their hands and took a deep breath. "Well, here goes nothing," Atsumu says as they log into their accounts.

Their phones started pinging continuously as the flood of unopened notifications bombards their phones. They both turned to each other before laughing. Still, they ignored the notifications that kept their phones pinging and just posted photos of them with the same caption.

_We're back._

They turned off their phones after that and went to sleep with a smile on their face as they feel more liberated. The restrictions they once felt were gone, and it felt like a heavy burden was lifted off their chest as they slowly go back to the things they used to enjoy.

**-*-**

"I can't believe Kita kicked us out," Atsumu complained with a pout on his face. It's been a month since they went back to playing volleyball. They weren't back to being professional athletes, but they practice with pro-players from time to time.

"Come on; he didn't kick us out. He just told us to explore around Hyogo more," Oikawa said as he looks out the window, "besides, the only place I've been in Hyogo is Amagasaki and Nishinomiya,"

Atsumu crossed his arms and pouted even more as he sinks into his seat. Oikawa just rolled his eyes and watched the view; watching the sceneries the train passed by was beautiful, but it made him miss Miyagi. He kept his eyes out the window as he thinks about Miyagi, his family, and the rest of Seijoh.

Oikawa was busy reminiscing when he felt a handhold his. He looked at Atsumu, who gave him a soft smile and was letting his thumb rub comforting circles on his hand.

"Ya, alright?" Atsumu asked. Oikawa looked at him and nodded, "Yeah, I just miss Miyagi,"

Atsumu pressed his lips into a thin line as he thinks of a way to make Oikawa feel better, "why don't you tell me stories of what you missed, yeah?"

Oikawa chuckled and nodded. He tightens his hold on Atsumu's hand. Oikawa took a deep breath and started talking about what he missed, how he missed his sister and parent's smoldering him with love and kiss, how he missed Takeru's constant teasing, how he missed his Friday nights with Makki. He also told him about how he missed Seijoh but never mentioned Iwaizumi. Atsumu patiently listened, throwing comments, and laughing at their antics until they arrived at their stop.

"I didn't know Kobe would look this beautiful," Oikawa said once they took a step out of the train. He turned towards Atsumu with an accusatory glare, "how dare you keep me away from here?"

Atsumu laughed at the faux hurt Oikawa was showing him, "c'mon, you never asked me to show you outside Amagasaki,"

Oikawa rolled his eyes as they walk towards the deck to get a cruise. They got on the cruise ship, the view was amazing, and they took multiple pictures. Some solo shots and some together before walking to the edge and just admiring the buildings and view they passed. The breeze felt nice against their skin, and the heat from the sun was enough to warm them up without burning their skin. They shared random stories of their childhood, and when the cruise had ended, they went to Kobe Oji Zoo. They enjoyed feeding the animals and taking photos with them. Still, it wasn't fun when a monkey reached out and grabbed Atsumu's hair or when a bird had pecked Oikawa's face instead of the food in his hand. But those events weren't enough to ruin the rest of their day. They just made their day better.

They proceeded to Kobe Harborland to treat themselves to shopping after suffering at the zoo. They splurged on the arcade games and watched a movie before going to a restaurant to have dinner.

"Hey, wanna try the Ferris wheel before we head home?" Atsumu asked and raised his head to look at Oikawa, who was standing still beside him. He looked at where his eyes were focused, and he immediately froze, his blood ran cold, and he suddenly felt himself break into a cold sweat.

"Tooru," An awfully familiar voice called out when neither of them moved. Oikawa's eyes were locked with olive-green ones, while Atsumu's was locked with dark inkwells. Oikawa immediately reached for Atsumu's hand for comfort and support, but his head snapped towards the blond when he felt a sweating palm and a tight grip.

"Atsumu," Sakusa called out and took a step towards the blond. Oikawa panicked and stepped between them. He gave Atsumu a quick glance and saw that he was trembling behind him.

Atsumu had always been Oikawa's support. He'd always been there throughout Oikawa's slow recovery from his trauma. He was so used to Atsumu's smiles and comforting words that he overlooked how difficult it must've been for Atsumu to be the brave one, to be the one bottling everything up and putting aside his own emotions just to care for Oikawa. So, Oikawa took a deep breath and decided to keep the distance between Atsumu and Sakusa even though he himself was quivering from the intense gaze he felt coming from Iwaizumi.

"Don't step any closer, Sakusa," Oikawa threatens, his voice low and husky as he warns the raven-haired spiker. He watched as Sakusa's dark irises stare at him, Oikawa couldn't point out what those eyes held, but he felt his legs start to wobble.

"I'm not going to hurt him," Sakusa says in a monotone. Oikawa shook his head and took a step back. They were in a crowd, and that was enough to make Oikawa feel a little better. At least he's confident they won't hurt them in public.

"Oikawa, let's just go," Atsumu said as he tightens his grip on Oikawa's hand. He looked up and accidentally locked his gaze with Sakusa. He gulped and took a deep breath when he saw the same fondness that Sakusa would show them when they were still dating, back when they were still happy.

"Tooru, let's go," Atsumu repeated and pulled Oikawa's hand as he turns around, but he was tugged back. He turned around and saw that Iwaizumi had his hands wrapped around Oikawa's wrist, and they were staring at each other.

"Tooru," Atsumu called out to snap him out of the dazed look he had on Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi's eyes darted towards the brunette for a split second, eyes throwing a threat at Atsumu before he returns his gaze towards Oikawa.

"Tooru," Iwaizumi called out and took a step towards Oikawa, the latter flinched and took a step back, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything I did,"

"Tooru, don't listen to him," Atsumu said and was about to take a step towards Oikawa to snap him back to reality. Atsumu could tell Oikawa still loved Iwaizumi. The way the brunette was looking at the spiker in front of him told Atsumu that Oikawa still loved him, and he could tell that Oikawa was ready to forgive him again.

"Tooru-" He called out once again and was ready to tug at Oikawa's hand for them to leave when Iwaizumi was slowly walking towards him to cup his face. But someone stopped him. He stared at the gloved hand that gently wrapped its fingers around his wrist. He looked up and locked gazes with Sakusa.

"Atsumu, let him go," Sakusa whispered. His voice was soft and gentle, and it reminded Atsumu of the good times they spent together. He could feel his heart beating fast, but it wasn't because of fear this time. It was because of longing. "I'm sorry, Tsumu,"

Atsumu's heart skipped a beat when he heard his name. He closed his eyes and held back the tears that were ready to fall. As he stands there listening to Sakusa's apology, a realization hit him. He still loved the man who hurt, and he's been waiting for an apology all this time. It was easy to convince himself that he was over Sakusa when he wasn't seeing him. However, now that the man himself was standing in front of him was looking at him with apologetic eyes that held longing and fondness, Atsumu found himself ready to forgive again. All the pain was forgotten, and he was ready to give the man in front of him another shot.

"Omi," The nickname slipped past his lips so easily, and a glimmer of hope shined in Sakusa's eyes.

"Yes, 'Tsumu?" Sakusa asked, his voice still soft and low as he slowly walks towards Atsumu, his hands slowly taking away Atsumu's from Oikawa's.

Oikawa flinched when he felt cold, gloved hands touch his. Iwaizumi was still in front of him, eyes looking deeply into his as Iwaizumi's hand slowly move in another attempt to cup Oikawa's face.

"Tooru, I'm genuinely sorry this time. So, please, come back with me to Miyagi, your family's waiting for you, especially Takeru," Iwaizumi said in an attempt to guilt-trip the brunette into going home with him. The roughness in his voice was gone and was replaced by a gentle tone, the tone that Iwaizumi would use whenever they were the only ones together, the tone he'd use when he's vulnerable and shows nothing but love towards him.

"Iwa-chan, I-" Oikawa was about to respond. He was about to let himself fall into temptation once again, and he almost said yes, but a yell became their saving grace.

"Watch where you're going!" Iwaizumi yelled to the woman who bumped into his shoulder, and this was enough to snap Oikawa and Atsumu from the spell their former boyfriends placed on them.

"Atsumu, run," Oikawa said and grabbed Atsumu's hand as they run away from them. They were bumping into random people, and they would apologize, but they didn't stop in their tracks. They could hear their names being called, making the people they pass by look at them with questioning gazes and judging stares as they run like convicts escaping jail.

Oikawa didn't know where they were going. All he knew was they needed to run. He lets his long legs lead them through the crowded streets of Kobe, and by some miracle, they were nearing a train station. They glanced at each other for a split second as if they were asking each other permission to just ride the train without knowing where it's headed. They both nodded at each other, and with that, they rode the train.

As their feet land on the metal floors of the train, their departure was announced, and the last thing they saw as the doors closed were the desperate faces of the two men who were chasing them.

They were panting inside the train, sweat dripping on the side of their faces as they stand there to recover their breaths.

"God, I almost fell for that," Atsumu whispered as he collects himself.

"I know, me too," Oikawa said and scanned the train for possible seats. "Let's sit there,"

"Yeah," Atsumu said, and they walked to the furthest corner of the train with their hands interlaced.

They arrived back at Kita's place a minute before midnight, the train they rode lead them to Suzurandai, and they needed to ride another one to arrive back at Amagasaki. They were exhausted when they arrived, their body felt heavy, and they felt drained, not because of the running or the train rides but because of the uneventful meeting they had with their exes.

"You're home pretty late," Kita said the moment they entered the house. The setters shared a glance before telling Kita everything that happened as they sit on the couch with him. Kita listened to them in silence before standing up and saying, "I'll run you both a bath before you go to sleep,"

They were left in silence, neither spoke nor moved until a full minute had passed, and Atsumu decided to speak, "do you want to go back to Miyagi?"

Oikawa turned to him and gave him a sad smile, "yeah,"

They went back to silence once again until Oikawa broke it this time, "what about you? Do you want to return to MSBY?"

Atsumu nodded, "yeah,"

Silence enveloped them again until Kita told them that the bath was ready. Both of them stood up and walked towards the bathroom. They've shared baths before in springs, so they were fine with sharing baths in Kita's house. The silence continued until they were lying on their futon, their gazes locked on the ceiling.

"That was a close call, huh?" Atsumu says before pressing his lips into a thin line. His mind went to Sakusa and remembered how those dark orbs stared at him with so much love and fondness that it made him wonder how Sakusa could look at him like that after everything that happened?

"Yeah, thank goodness Iwaizumi lost his shit for a second," Oikawa whispered replied. "But we're not going back, even if we miss MSBY and Miyagi, right?"

They both nodded, but they also felt fear when they remembered how they almost fell for their manipulation.

"Yeah," Atsumu said despite knowing that the incident made them realize that they still had feelings for the people that destroyed them.

Neither slept well that night, so they decided to visit Kita's room and sleep with him. They've always found Kita comforting, and having his arms wrapped around them made them feel safe. But the safety they found in Kita's home vanished when they woke up to people yelling at each other the next morning.

"Shit!" Atsumu yelled and scrambled to run to where he heard his brother's voice.

"Atsumu," Oikawa called out and immediately followed suit when he heard yells and screams coming from outside.

Both of them stood still at the door when they saw familiar curly locks and spiky hair. Their body started to tremble as the safety they found was destroyed within a second.

"Get the fuck away from my brother, Sakusa!" Osamu yelled, his hands tightly gripping Sakusa's collar while the latter's gloved hand gripped Osamu's wrists.

"I just want to talk to him!" Sakusa yelled through his mask, eyes glaring at Osamu.

"Osamu, let us talk to them," Iwaizumi interceded by grabbing Osamu's left wrist, but Kita grabbed his shoulder and said, "leave my property of I'm calling the police,"

"Atsumu," Sakusa called out when he saw Atsumu staring at the scene. He gave him the puppy eyes that would always make Atsumu weak against him. "Talk them down. We just want to talk to you and Oikawa," he said in the softest voice he can, knowing Atsumu loved that tone of his.

Everyone's attention went to the boys, who were frozen on the spot. Atsumu took a deep breath and tightly gripped his pajamas, "no, just leave, Sakusa,"

"Atsumu," Sakusa called out, his voice pained from the way Atsumu called him by his last name and not by his nickname.

"Tooru, I'm begging you, let me talk to you," Iwaizumi said and pushed Kita away to kneel on the ground. Atsumu watched as Oikawa take a step, probably to pull Iwaizumi up and make him stand, but Atsumu grabbed his arm and shook his head.

"But," Oikawa protested, but Atsumu shook his head again, saying, "Oikawa, let the scars on your body be a reminder of what he did to you,"

That was enough to make Oikawa stop and lower his head. He didn't want to look at Iwaizumi as he says, "leave,"

"Tooru, I'm begging you, just talk to me," Iwaizumi's voice was strained and pained. It was hurting Oikawa to hear him beg. It was making his heart constrict that Iwaizumi was pleading for his attention. But the begging he was doing now won't erase the pain and trauma he'd given Oikawa.

"Tooru, I still love you," Iwaizumi said. Oikawa shut his eyes and shook his head. He wanted to say he still loved him, too, because a few months of being away won't easily erase the love Oikawa had for Iwaizumi for decades.

"I'm sorry, Iwaizumi, you need to leave," Oikawa said and turned his back so he wouldn't change his mind. He and Atsumu had been doing well, they've made progress, and he didn't want Iwaizumi to destroy that because as much as he loved Iwaizumi, he knew he wasn't good for him.

"Atsumu," It was Sakusa's turn to beg, Atsumu's eyes went to him, and he pressed his lips to a thin line as he watches Sakusa slowly kneel beside Iwaizumi, "I'm sorry,"

Atsumu fisted his hands and said through gritted teeth, "get up," his voice was harsher than he thought, and the tear he was trying to suppress fell from his eyes.

"No, not until you forgive me," Sakusa said and lowered his head to the ground. Atsumu's heart clenched. He never asked for Sakusa to beg for forgiveness. He never wanted Sakusa to go through the same thing he did.

"Stand up, Sakusa," Atsumu commanded, he was ready to pull him up, but Oikawa stopped him by wrapping his arm around his shoulder.

"Atsumu, let's just leave, let your brother and Kita handle them," Oikawa said as he redirects Atsumu inside the house. Grandmother Yumie came out of her room and walked towards them with pity in her eyes as she guides them inside.

The three of them sat in silence inside the house. They couldn't tell how long the yells and begging kept going, and by the time the Osamu and Kita came in, Suna and Aran were there.

"Oh," Atsumu whispered as he grips his cup of coffee, "'m sorry ya had to deal with that,"

"Why are ya apologizing for that? It's not like ya asked fer it," Osamu said as he leans on the wall, "so, what are ya both plannin' to do now?"

Silence filled the entire living room, but it was broken by Oikawa's voice, "I think I'll go to Argentina,"

Everyone's attention was on him, but he kept his eyes locked on his cup of tea, "I want to meet my former coach there. It looks like staying in Japan won't do us any good,"

"When are ya planning to leave?" Atsumu asked as he fidgets with his cup, his foot impatiently tapping on the tatami.

"Two days from now, I got two plane tickets ready. Departure time would be at one in the morning, so I wouldn't bump into them," Oikawa answered without raising his head. He could feel his heart beating fast as the stares on him intensify.

"Fer, who is the second plane ticket?" Osamu asked. Oikawa could feel his piercing gaze towards him, and he could tell everyone knew who owns the other one. They just needed confirmation.

"Atsumu," Oikawa answered and turned towards the blond who was looking at him with wide eyes. "If you want to, that is,"

"Since when did ya have time to do that?" Atsumu asked.

"I booked the flight online while you were asleep last night," Oikawa answered. Atsumu pressed his lips into a thin line before looking at his twin.

"Don't look at me like that," Osamu said, "do what ya wanna do,"

Atsumu turned towards Oikawa once more before asking, "we'll come back, right?"

Oikawa smiled and gave him a nod, "yeah, once we're completely okay, we'll come back,"

Atsumu took a deep breath and turned towards Osamu once again, "you'll visit?"

"Of course, I will ya scrub, you'll die without seeing me fer half a year," Osamu teased to lighten up the mood.

"Shut yer trap, yer the one who'll die without me," Atsumu retorted, and their banter continued, which lightened up the tense atmosphere that surrounded them earlier.

The day ended with everyone staying, and the next two days were spent preparing everything they needed. Both of them were scared. They were running off to a different country, and they knew what they're doing was more difficult than them running to a different prefecture, but they had each other, at least that's reassuring.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Oikawa asked as they take their bags and load them into the car.

Atsumu nodded, "I am. I spent the entire day with ma and Osamu yesterday. That should be enough,"

Oikawa hummed, "We'll come back, I promise," he reassured and gave Atsumu's hand a squeeze.

The ride to the airport was quiet, and the only thing that filled the silence was the radio. Kita had volunteered to drive them there, and as much as Osamu wanted to say goodbye to his brother, Atsumu didn't allow it. He didn't want to cry and decide not to go because he knew that Japan was too small for all four of them, that if he stayed, he's sure Sakusa will find him no matter what.

They arrived at the airport, passports in their hands as they wave Kita goodbye. They board their plane as they look forward to an uncertain future.

"I guess this is where we say hello to a new life for a second time, huh?" Atsumu says as their plane lands in Argentina.


End file.
